幸运飞艇

印度软件工程师的苦逼生活

What are some bitter truths of software engineers in India?

印度软件工程师的苦逼生活

Gaurav Dubey,

Although many answers are written but nobody pointed out common problems which most of the software engineers face in their personal life.

  • Wife doubts on you(Specially if she is not Technical) : I am Java Tech Lead and day to day face many coding and process related challenges. When I return home (around 10 PM) after complete loss of energy I just want to have food and then bed with minimum verbal communication. Most of the time we sleep like below. She keeps thinking “My husband doesn’t love me or there is someone else in his life.” I keep thinking “Why my code is not working or how to handle particular client requirement.”

虽然大家贡献了很多答案,但还没有人提到大多数软件工程师在个人生活中面临的常见问题。

  • 妻子怀疑你(特别是她若不是技术人员):我是Java的技术组长,每天都要应对很多编码和程序方面的挑战。当我精疲力尽地回到家(晚上10点左右)时,我只想吃点东西,然后上床睡觉,啥都不想说了。大多数时间我们都像下图这么睡。她一直认为:“我丈夫不爱我,不然就是他还有其他女人。”我则一直在思考:“为什么我的代码出了问题,不然就是我该如何处理特定客户的需求。”

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  • Establish yourself in a Metro City:- To establish yourself first get a good paying job, purchase a car, a Flat (minimum 45 lacs), an Insurance policy, Furniture for home, Medical Policy, LED TV, Fridge, Washing Machine, Kitchen Stuff, ACs, have some FDs in bank, some good investments blah blah. Very short list(Hell). You are lucky if you have another helping hand from your family but not true for many SEs.
  • Baldness:- Many male software engineers face too much hair fall in their early life. This is a common problem in Delhi and NCR. Just think how those people feel. Every one of them want hair transplant but only few can afford. As soon as you lose your hairs you lose your confidence too. You face challenges in your life. Your wife taunts you if married (in many cases not every) otherwise you face multiple rejections from girls (be it for marriage or love proposal). I must tell you this very painful.
  • English language problem:- No matter how good you are in English and comfortable in communicating with foreign client, there will be always a person in client team whose accent is beyond your understanding, and this guy speaks more than others in any discussion. I am not joking here , this holds true for me and for my many friends.
  • 在大都市成家立业:先要安顿下来,找一份高薪工作,买一辆车,一套公寓(至少得450万),一份保险单,家具,医疗保险,LED电视,冰箱,洗衣机,厨房用品,空调,在银行存些定期存款,做点好的投资等等。这个清单很短。如果你有家人的帮助,那你很幸运,但对许多软件工程师来说,情况并非如此。
  • 谢顶:许多男性软件工程师在他们年纪轻轻时就面临头发大量脱落的问题。想想那些人会作何等感受吧。他们每个人都想做头发移植,但只有少数人能负担得起。一旦你失去了头发,你也失去了自信。你会在生活中面临挑战。如果你结婚了,你的妻子会嘲笑你(多数情况下不是每一个妻子都会如此),若还未婚,你会被很多女孩拒绝(不管是求婚还是示爱)。我必须告诉你这很痛苦。
  • 英语问题:无论你的英语有多好,与外国客户交流时也很顺畅,客户团队中总会有一个人的口音超出你的理解范围,而且这个人每次讨论时都比其他人说得多。我不是在开玩笑,我和我的许多朋友都遇到过。
  • Social Reach:- It starts shrinking day by day. It is very difficult for you to attend any function of your relative or friend. You always wish for everything on weekend. I will not be surprised if someday Software Engineers start saying weekends are good for someone to die so that we can attend funeral.
  • Quora upvotes expectation:- It is not funny. I have seen many Software engineers writing multiple well researched answers just to get 1k or 2k upvotes but hardly get 200 upvotes. The reason is, quora gets 60% traffic from India, and Indians are emotional and to an extent foolish. They are busy reading, asking, writing “ what another fucking country thinks of India? What the fucking best thing you read today? What brought tears in your eye?” So hardly expected Indians to spent time on logical and knowledge based answers.
  • Unwanted calls from different banks sales department:- All of us gets call from xyz bank sales department. They will tell you that “they have an special scheme going for your company. Please apply for credit card, personal loan, mutual fund etc.” Reality is, you want nothing. All you want peace of mind.
  • 社交范围:开始一天一天地缩小。你难得参加亲戚朋友组织的任何活动。你会祈祷周末一切顺利。如果有一天软件工程师说周末是一个适合过世的好日子,这样我们就有时间参加葬礼了,我绝对不会感到惊讶。
  • 期待在Quora上获得点赞:-这并不好笑。我见过许多软件工程师写了很多经过充分研究的答案,希望能得到1000或2000的点赞数量,但实际上几乎难及200。原因是,Quora有60%的访问量都来自于印度,而印度人非常情绪化,在某种程度上也很愚蠢。他们整天只会看、只会问、也只会回答“其他该死的国家是如何看待印度的?”“你今天读到什么最好的帖子了?”“什么事情令你流泪?”这样的问题。印度人基本上不会花时间阅读基于逻辑和知识的答案。
  • 来自各家银行销售部门的骚扰电话:我们所有人都接到过XYZ银行销售部门的电话。他们会告诉你,“他们针对你的公司推出了一个特别方案。请申请信用卡、个人贷款、互助基金等。”但实际上你什么都不想要。你只想心平气和地不受打扰。

 

Chetan Sharma, Building software since 2005

I am from the fraternity and have spent 13 years in this field.

Mostly for Male Software Engineers.

我来自兄弟会,在这个行业工作了13年。

以下基本都是对男性软件工程师适用的。

1.The girl who comes to your seat with twinkle in her eyes is not interested in you. She wants to get the fucking work done. And she will not date for your favour. She thinks you're a wussy.

2.Most of you my friends including me have a rubbish and sloppy communication and weirdo accent. Get some training dude.

3.Your dressing sense sucks. Date a fashion designer if it is at all possible for you. Date? Yes. Don't wear formal pants with sneakers or sports shoes. It's not cool.

4.Take care of personal hygiene. No wonder girls run away from you. Use some good perfume and make sure you eat mint after consuming tons of onion during lunch or after smoking.

5.Make sure your tummy doesn't entice me to say that you're pregnant without delivery(PWD). Take care of your health my friend. It's important.

6.Become interesting. Get a life outside GOT, LOTR, and many more. Read something about evolution. Read books by Matt Ridley, Robert Greene and Neil Strauss.

1.那个眉目含情走向你座位的姑娘并不是对你感兴趣。她只是想把工作做完。她也不会跟你约会。她觉得你是个老实人。

2.你们中的大多数人,包括我在内,说话时总是废话连篇,有种奇怪的口音。得好好训练一下,伙计。

3.你的穿着品味太差了。如果可能的话,和时装设计师约会吧。约会?是的。不要穿正装西裤搭配板鞋或运动鞋。这一点儿也不酷。

4.注意个人卫生。怪不得女孩们会从你们身边跑开。喷点好香水,午餐吃了很多洋葱后或吸烟后一定记得来点薄荷。

5.别让我一看到你的肚子,就说你是个不会分娩的孕妇。照顾好自己的健康,我的朋友。这非常重要。

6.让自己有趣一些。生活中除了GOT,LOTR,做点别的有益的事吧。读一读关于改变的书吧。比如马特·雷德利、罗伯特·格林和尼尔·施特劳斯等人写的书。

7.If you think the girl you discreetly look over your desktop doesn't notice you then I am telling you that she knows. She thinks you're a pervert. If you like her go and tell her. She thinks you lack balls to ask her out.

8.Those with 1% lucky smart genes and good built but bad accent and poor self image, if you think girls in India will drool over you because it happens in some deodorant advertisements, then arse off. It's India. No one will come to you and that's why that talkative, confident, ugly and smart ass friend of yours is sleeping with all the girls. You need to talk to her buddy to create some interest.

9.The Pizza you're eating during unsolicited late stays at your office is the biggest cause of your growing waistline. Cut the crap and carb. You're acting like a greedy pig here.

10.Cut down your time in front of idiot box and laptops and start going to gym for god sake. Learn some moves so that you don't embarrass yourself in the upcoming annual party dance. Your weird dance has already repelled so many girls from you. Specially the snake dance of yours.

7.如果你以为你从办公桌顶偷偷观察的姑娘没有注意到你,那么我跟你说,她是知道的。她认为你是个变态。如果你喜欢她,就去告诉她。她觉得你没胆量约她出去。

8.对那些拥有聪明头脑、身材出众,但口音很重,自身形象不佳的1%的幸运儿,如果你认为印度女孩会像某些除臭剂广告中那样而对你垂涎三滴,你就赶紧走开吧。这可是印度。没有姑娘会看上你的,这就是为什么你那个健谈、自信、又丑又自以为是的朋友可以把所有姑娘骗上床的原因。你需要和她的朋友谈谈,让她对你产生点兴趣。

9.你在办公室主动加班时吃的披萨,正是你腰围增加的最大元凶。你就像只贪吃的猪。

10.看在上帝的份上,缩短你在电视机和笔记本电脑前的时间吧,去健身房锻炼起来吧。学点动作,这样你们就不会在即将到来的年度舞会上继续尴尬。你那奇怪的舞蹈已经吓退了很多姑娘了。尤其是你那段蛇舞。

Some common for entire fraternity

还有一些是对整个兄弟会成员适用的

1.Slurping on free office Maggie is also bloating your belly. Let me tell you Maggie is crispy because it's already fried. Don't fool yourself that it is fat free.

2.Office flings makes you a point of topic. Don't be an open book. You get paid for work and not for dating.

3.The words like layoff, bench trimming and recession often gives one sleepless nights and heart attacks.

4.You hate office tea/coffee but still drink it everyday.

5.The tea vendor outside your office makes more money than most of us. We all secretly aspire to open a shop like that but then our ego ruins our plans.

6.Hell everyone wants to go to Mecca of IT and we often ruin our career more for that than the benefit we get.

1.办公室里不要钱的Maggie也会让你的肚腩越来越大。告诉你,Maggie很脆就是因为它是炸制过的。不要自欺欺人地说它不含脂肪。

2.办公室恋情让你成为话题的焦点。不要毫无城府。你是因为工作付出获得收入,而不是因为约会。

3.裁员、待命和经济衰退这样的字眼经常会让人彻夜难眠,引发心脏病。

4.你讨厌办公室的茶/咖啡,但每天还是会喝。

5.办公室外面的茶贩子赚的比我们大多数人都多。我们都暗地里渴望开一家这样的店,但我们的自负阻拦了我们的计划。

6.该死的,每个人都想去IT业的麦加,对比我们能得到的好处,我们经常为此毁了我们的职业生涯。

7.You can't be just a software developer in India. You have to become TL if you want hike. No body cares for a developer. People think coding can be done by anyone.

8.The relation between on site and off site is of “Nagin and Sapera”

9.After honey moon period dies companies of same category are often similar and you consider why did I jump for 20% extra?

10.You get married to a technology. Don't do that. One marriage is enough. Treat them like girl friends and boy friends. Flirt, tease, enjoy and learn.

11.Don't inflate your lifestyle with every pay rise. The extra money in the bank will come handy when you would like to negotiate worth your manager.

7.在印度,你不可能只是一名软件开发人员。没有人关心开发人员。人人都认为随便一个人都能编写代码。

8.在现场或不在现场,就是“纳金与萨贝拉”的关系。

9.蜜月期过后,同类公司往往都一样,你得考虑一下,为什么我要为了20%的涨幅跳槽?

10.你跟技术结婚了。请不要这样做。结婚么,一次就够了。把他们当做男女朋友吧。可以调情,戏弄,享受和学习。

11.不要一涨工资就大手大脚。当你想和经理讨价还价时,银行里的存款就派上用场了。

译文来源:幸运飞艇 /46953.html 译者:Joyceliu

 

Anonymous

Here are some of the facts.

事实如下:

1.They are the most unorganized workforce in India. For a workforce of about 2.75 Million, they don't have a platform to raise grievances or prevent exploitation. Large service companies have people in the resource pool( Not assigned to any projects) who doesn't do any actual work. When there is a hint of recession these people are laid off first. The average pool size is atleast about 15–20% of the total workforce. So at least 10k people is at the risk of getting laid off anytime in a big service company.

2.Overtime and working weekends are very common. Pulling a 14 hour work day is very common for the people in IT industry. There is no overtime allowance and although not explicitly stated employees are expected to stretch the time in office if needed.

3.If you want to earn well, be prepared to change companies frequently. A 5yr experienced lateral entry for most of the case will be paid more than a person who was working in the same company for 5 years.

4.Most of the workforce won't be working in cutting edge technologies. Major chunk of the work is maintenance and modification of the Client's legacy systems. These could be using 15 year old and now dead technologies.

1.他们是印度最没有组织的劳动力。对于275万劳动力来说,他们没有平台来表达不满或阻止剥削。大型服务公司的人才储备池中(尚未分配工作)都有不承担任何实际工作的员工。一旦出现经济衰退的迹象,这些人就会率先被解雇。人才储备池的平均规模至少占总工作人员的15-20%。因此,在大型服务公司,至少有1万人随时都有被解雇的危险。

2.平日加班、周末加班是家常便饭。对于IT行业的人来说,每天工作14个小时是非常普遍的。没有加班津贴,尽管没有明确规定,但如果有需要,员工就该延长工作时间。

3.如果你想赚大钱,就要做好频繁跳槽的准备。在大多数情况下,一个有5年经验的新员工会比在同一家公司工作了5年的人收入更高。

4.大多数员工不会在尖端技术领域工作。主要工作是维护和修改客户端的遗留系统。这些老技术可能已经用了15年,现在都已过时了。

5.Going onsite is not a pleasure trip. Life on-site will mostly depend on the client and for most of the cases it will be extremely difficult and tiring job. People fresh in the industry dreams of going on site and we can see people who have been onsite for years returning to India just because they couldn't take it anymore.

6.In small companies and small teams technical skill will be more valued and you will get more exposure. In larger companies and larger teams you won't be getting that much exposure and this hampers the development of hands on technical skills.

7.Your salary will depend greatly on your negotiating skills and the urgency for the company to fill the vacancy. People with same skill set, same years of experience and working in the same project sitting side by side doing the same kind of work could be paid very differently.

8.Every IT professional India would have asked this question to themselves at least once. “How many more years can I continue doing this?”.

5.出现场可不是出游。现场情况主要取决于客户,在大多数情况下都是极其困难和累人的。刚进入这个行业的人都梦想着出现场,而有多年现场经历的人回到印度,就是因为他们再也无法忍受了。

6.在小公司和小团队中,技术技能更有价值,你会得到更多的表现机会。而在大公司和大团队中,你不会得到那么多的机会,这阻碍了技术技能的进步。

7.你的薪水在很大程度上将取决于你的谈判技巧和公司填补这个空缺的紧迫性。同样的技能,同样的经验,在同一个项目中并肩工作,做同样工作的人的报酬可能差别极大。

8.每个IT专业人士都应该至少问自己这个问题一次:“我还能这样干多少年呢?”

9.When you see an IT guy in full formal attire including Tie on a hot summer day please understand it's not his choice. Most companies have a strict dress code to be followed.

10.For all the Auto and Cab drivers who think it's ok to charge us Extra since we are IT guys, please know that we could be making less than you guys.

9.当你在炎热的夏天看到穿着正装打着领带的IT人员时,请理解一下,这不是他的选择。大多数公司都有严格的着装要求。

10.对所有因为我们是IT从业者而觉得可以多收点儿钱的汽车和出租车司机们,请记住,我们可能赚的还不如你们。

 

Diego Vega, studied at Christ College

Software Engineering has no specific educational parameter.

The bitter truth is, software engineers around the globe have to compete with people of other engineering branches. It does’t matter what undergrad degree one has, anybody can switch to IT. I have seen Chemical Engineers, homeopathy doctors, chartered accountants, B.Com, B . Sc in Physics, MBA etc sitting in front of computer and doing things completely out of their league.

Thanks to all the certifications. Earn some money, get a 50,000 rupees certification with the help of a 15,000 rupees dump, get a job in an IT company and jeopardize your colleague's life. This is what 90% of the IT crowd is. Special Thanks to the HRs. More than half of the HR fraternity were once call center employees. All they know is certification. A MBBS with a CEH V9 is considered the leader of Anonymous and is hired immediately, whereas a B.Tech Computer Science, with no certification is rejected.

软件工程没有特别的教育背景要求。

残酷的事实是,全球的软件工程师都得和其他工程类的人竞争。一个人拥有什么样的本科学位并不重要,任何人都可以转读IT专业。我见过化学工程师,顺势疗法医生,注册会计师,商业,物理,MBA等专业的理学学士端坐在电脑前,表现出众。

感谢所有的认证。挣点钱,考下50000卢比的证书,在一家IT公司找份工作,让你同事的生活岌岌可危。IT从业者中90%都是这样。特别感谢人力资源部。超过一半的HR兄弟会成员都曾经是呼叫中心的员工。他们只知道认证。拥有CEH V9的MBBS会被立即聘用。计算机科学的本科生,无证不录用。

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Shubham Pathania, Senior Software Engineer at Softtek (2018-present)

I'm working as a software engineer from last two years, so i believe I'm eligible to answer this one.

Firstly,

我从两年前开始担任软件工程师的工作,所以我相信我有资格回答这个问题。

首先,

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A software engineer is a person who applies the principles of software engineering to the design, development, maintenance, testing, and evaluation of the software that make computers or other devices containing software work.

软件工程师是将软件工程学的原理应用于软件的设计、开发、维护、测试和评估,使计算机或其他包含软件的设备能够正常工作。

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Some of the general facts are:

一些普遍事实是:

1.This country is producing software engineers in mass production without any skill set. If you throw ten stones in the air, 8 of them probably hit engineers!

2.The moment someone acknowledges that you're a software engineer they think you were developing next facebook or twitter.

3.If some software (sometimes even hardware) goes corrupt in the house/neighborhood, they believe you can fix it in no time.

4.Most of them are doing tasks which anyone with basic computer knowledge can perform.

5.Bench is recognized as the paid vacation by the most of the engineers.

1.这个国家正在大量培养没有任何技能的软件工程师。如果你向空中扔十块石头,可能会有八块砸到工程师!

2.当有人说你是软件工程师时,他们会以为你正在开发下一个facebook或twitter。

3.如果家里/邻居家有些软件(有时甚至是硬件)出问题了,他们相信你能在短时间内修复。

4.他们中的大多数人正在做任何具有基本计算机知识的人都能完成的任务。

5.替补软件工程师被大多数工程师视为带薪假期。

6.Manual Testers are believed to be minority group and untouchables in the community.

7.They have to maintain task tracker and other project documents which consumes more time than the actual coding.

8.Passionate is the word which they make you forget in the first few months.

9.The only thing most of the engineers are worried about is to getting their leaves approved by the manager.

10.Most of them are software engineers until they cracked Bank PO/CAT/GMAT and other streams which makes their engineering irrelevant in the first place.

6.手工测试人员被认为是社区中的少数群体和不可接触的人。

7.他们必须维护任务跟踪器和其他项目文档,这比实际编码要花费更多的时间。

8.在最初的几个月里,你就会忘掉激情这个词。

9.大多数工程师唯一焦虑的事情就是得到经理的休假批准。

10.他们中的大多数人都是软件工程师,直到他们破解了银行的PO/CAT/GMAT和其他数据流,这些内容从一开始就和他们的工作毫不相干。

 

Sandeep Pawar, IITian and ITian

Everyone want to be a ‘Developer’ and not a ‘Tester’ before even knowing what the actual role of the both.

在知道两者的实际工作内容之前,每个人都想成为“开发人员”而非“测试人员”。

1.Posh offices, delightful infrastructure, and delusive on-site opportunities attract most of the youth to IT industry.

2.People who work at software giants like Infosys, TCS, Accenture etc. are often mocked before even knowing their designation there.

3.People are grouped into teams randomly and no one gives a damn about their interests or expertise.

4.Those who don’t get promotion or expected appraisal rating considers themselves as a victim of office-politics.

5.In MNCs, usually, the remote is with the team sitting outside India and software engineers here in India have to dance (Work hours, shifts etc.) on their tunes.

1.豪华的办公室、赏心悦目的办公场所和迷惑性的出现场机会吸引了大多数年轻人进入IT行业。

2.在印孚瑟斯、TCS、埃森哲等软件巨头工作的人,在知道自己在这些公司的职位之前,经常遭到欺骗。

3.员工被随机分组,没有人在意他们的兴趣或专业知识。

4.那些没有得到晋升或达到预期评级的人会认为自己是办公室政治的受害者。

5.在跨国公司中,通常情况下,远程办公是和海外团队一起配合的,印度的软件工程师必须配合他们的工作节奏(工作时间、轮班等)。

6.The majority of the software engineers try in other companies SECRETLY in the hope of better environment but usually get the disappointment there too.

7.Everyone says- there is nothing good in IT after certain experience but they don’t leave this field.

8.Startup ideas haunt them but the lack of courage and load of responsibilities makes them neglect those ideas.

9.Very few actually understand their salary slip completely.

10.Office coffee is really bitter in taste. Not at all good. Thus, chaiwala (tea-stall) near the office makes lot of money.

6.大多数软件工程师会私下接触其他公司,希望得到更好的环境,但通常都会失望。

7.每个人都说——在获得一定的经验之后,IT业没什么好的,但他们不会离开这个行业。

8.创业的想法时刻在他们脑中盘旋,但是缺乏勇气和责任感使得他们忽视了这些想法。

9.很少有人能完全搞清楚他们的薪水单。

10.办公室的咖啡味道很苦。一点也不好喝。因此,办公室附近的茶摊赚得盆满钵满。

11.News with terms ‘layoff’, ‘recession’ gives them a soft heart attack.

12.The big irony is- non CS/IT people thinks CS/IT guys have upper hand in this industry while as CS/IT people thinks what is the use of their specialisation when they are doing the same work what chemical or mechanical engineer is doing sitting beside them.

The thing is- In India, software industry is for all.

11.新闻中出现的“裁员”、“经济衰退”等字眼会让他们心脏病发作。

12.最具讽刺意味的是,非计算机/IT人员认为计算机/IT人员在这个行业中占了上风,而计算机/IT人员则认为,当他们与化学或机械工程师一起做相同的工作时,他们的专业到底有什么用。

问题就在于——在印度,软件行业是面向所有专业的。

幸运飞艇原创译文,禁止转载!:幸运飞艇 > 印度 » 印度软件工程师的苦逼生活

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